Rudie, the Butch-Dyke Reindeer—A Holiday Wish* by Marie Cartier

It’s the holidays- those winter holidays

What do I want Santa to bring? Or rather, the goddess? The reindeer goddess –what do I want her

to give queer people—

My queer performance company, Queer Wise? And especially, of course, to give me?

Wisdom. Well, shit, we already have that.

Riches? Well if you count riches by the number of friends you have… as a friend said last night at another group xmas gathering- my lesbian book club—then we are already rich

Friend ship love riches are your community

I think we have that in my

Queer performance company—we have family as friends- friends as family

So–I think what we need, what we all need, is a beach vacation- seriously? No, I’m joking (maybe not)

What do we really need? A walk by the beach every day at sunset and making a wish that comes true.

And you know…

At this time of year not everyone knows that the reindeer if there had been reindeer pulling Santa’s sleigh would have been women, or girls, they had to be women because male reindeer lose their antlers before this winter season so the only reindeer with antlers right now are female…

Santa’s sleigh with all those reindeer had to be girl reindeer

So of course, women don’t necessarily get credit for that but there it is—women reindeer pulling the sleigh

Which means Rudolph was a girl reindeer and therefore Rudoph’s girlfriend Clarice—well…

so that means Rudolph and Clarice are lesbians so I think Santa is actually a goddess and then we are going going going to a great wild gay bar in the North Pole maybe by Iceland and then they will be doing the “Jingle Bell Rock” all night …it will be so cool, you know?

And we are doing it doing it doing it

Cheers, everybody.

-Marie Cartier

December 18, 2023

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Just a little rewrite to get you singing for the holidays

Rudie- the Butch Dyke Reindeer—THE SONG

You know Dasher and Dancer
And Prancer and Vixen,
Comet and Cupid
And Donner and Blitzen.
But do you recall
The most famous reindeer of all?

Rudie the butch dyke reindeer

(reindeer)
Had a very shiny nose
(she spent a lot of time outside)
And if you ever saw it
(saw it)
You would even say it glows
(like a flash light- how useful)
All of the other reindeer
(reindeer)
Never laughed and called her names

(she was too cool!)
They tried to beat her at pool

(Rudie was so good- the butch to beat!)

But she was a cute pool shark!

Then one foggy Christmas Eve
Santa came to say
(Ho Ho Ho)
Rudie with your nose so bright
Won’t you guide my sleigh tonight?
Then all the reindeer loved her
(loved her)
And they shouted out with glee
(cheers everybody!)
“Rudie the red-nosed reindeer
(reindeer)
You’ll go down in herstory!”
(we always knew it!)

original song lyrics here:https://www.lyricsondemand.com/christmascarols/r/rudolphtherednosedreindeerlyrics.html

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For more on the reindeer goddess check out my 2015 blog:

From the Archives: There Is No Santa-The Antlered Flying Goddess With Gifts by Marie Cartier (feminismandreligion.com)

***

And please note:

The 2015 post linked above was subsequently published in the amazing anthology:

Celebrating Seasons of the Goddess, edited by Helen Hye-Sook Hwang and Mary Ann Beavis (Mago Books, 2017) Chapter 80, pages 272-276
To purchase this great holiday seasonal book visit Mago books: Celebrating Seasons of the Goddess Volume 1 – Mago Books
And to see their other fabulous items: Mago Books – Magoism, the Way of WE in S/HE