Reaching a Time Space Reality by Caryn MacGrandle

Daily meditation has changed my life allowing me to stop taking anti-anxiety medication and giving me the tools I needed to change my life.  For years now, I have been escaping each and every day to the woods around my home: ten minutes of a recorded meditation and ten minutes of silence. 

A couple of weeks ago, thanks to technological eavesdropping, after asking my partner  what Joe Dispenza meant by “Space-Time” and “Time-Space”, up pops on my YouTube feed a meditation by Joe Dispenza on “Space-Time” and “Time-Space”.

The meditation is sixty minutes long, and I have been doing this almost daily for weeks.

It is not easy. 

My mind screams, “You don’t have time for this!!  You need to be DOING, DOING, DOING.  Solving all the many challenges in your life. Get going! Now!!”

But my inner voice quietly says, “Caryn, you know this is the most important thing in your life at the moment.  Getting your head right.”

I told my partner the other day that it is as if I have finally gotten the manual for life only instead of creating this perfect, wonderful life, most times, I feel as if I’m in the batting cage, and someone has turned it up to full speed.

My partner tells me, “You know Babe Ruth struck out all the time.  But when he hit it, oh my.”

Amazing, beautiful home run after home run after home run.

I keep swinging.

*

One of my favorite spots lately for meditation is at an out of the way nature preserve along a river.  It is at the end of a dirt road with no sign so most days, there are no people. I have a favorite spot along the river that I walk to with a wide open, leaf-covered sitting area overlooking a large tree leaning into the river.  Most days, I am sitting here meditating, watching the tree, the river, the birds and letting my mind drift.

Yesterday, I am sitting there listening to my sixty minute meditation, and all of a sudden, I see these spider web strands all throughout the tree.

They have been there all along, but yesterday is the first time that I have seen them.  I sit there in marvel looking at all of them throughout the entire tree.

*

From there, I have to go pick up my daughter from her tennis practice.  On the way, through downtown, I see a homeless person sleeping on the side of the road in a wheelchair.  My heart hurts.  Especially lately, I am often bowled over by all the surrounding pain.  Everywhere I turn, crisis after crisis:  mental health crisis, financial crisis, loved ones dying, health crisis, change and more change.

Sometimes I feel absolutely immobilized by all of it, and I wonder how I can go on in this world.

Sometimes I feel this deep, dark depression that is terrifying in its immensity.

Lately, in those times, my partner holds me, he rubs my back as I cry and sob. He kisses me over and over.

After spending the majority of my life in relationships where we took out and magnified our stress on each other, it is amazing and wondrous to be in one where we soothe each other.

My gratitude knows no bounds.

*

“Space-time” and “time-space”.  The concept is that most of us live entirely in “Space-time”: the culture and family that formed us, our bills, our job, our relationships, the matter that makes up our daily lives and keeps us moving through these lives.

The key though is to get to “Time-space”.  Drop your identify.  Everything that has brought you to the point in your life: your struggles, your relationships, your job, your home. Everything that defines you, drop it.

*

Create space around that, imagining the deep dark of space and connecting with Awareness.

It is difficult.  In the hours of meditation that I do, I have had glimpses.  That is all.

But in that Field of Possibility, in those glimpses of Awareness, that is where the Magick lives. 

That is where you can change your life and the world.

*

On the way to picking up my daughter, I have a Moment.

I have this Moment where I see all of these people:  a businessman sitting against a tree, a woman walking and some others.  I see their tremendous pain and struggling.

And then I see the strands that connect them.

I have this absolute amazing Moment of acceptance and knowing that the pain is leading us where we need to go.

The peace I feel knows no bounds.

*

They were always there, you see.  Those strands.

But this is the first time, I saw them with Awareness.

*

‘Good stuff,’ I think to myself as I point to right field and swing.