Human by Xochitl Alvizo

I’ve written about my existentialist leanings and how these are very much a reflection of my upbringing, and particularly my papa’s influence on me. He always talked about how we are all “just human.” He would humph disapprovingly at the use of categories or identity labels for people; he wanted to always affirm that all people are human, nothing more, nothing less. For my dad, labels and categories fixed people to a particular aspect of themselves.

He did not like the idea of reducing a person’s being, or limiting their many possibilities, with an overarching label. There were times with me when he would grumble if I referred to myself as Mexican-American or lesbian, for example, and he would say, “Argh, you’re human, that’s what you are, human.” He was always on guard about how a given identity can serve to limit my own imagination about myself or, worse, allow others to box me into their preconceived ideas of what that identity means.

I love country music, especially artists like Randy Travis, George Strait, Dolly Parton, and Garth Brooks, especially Garth Brooks. Garth’s music is what I played when I celebrated big, key moments of achievement during my Ph.D. Me and my best friends would sing along all night to his Double Live Album—to some of my family member’s chagrin. I love the storytelling and down to earth rhythm of country and of Garth’s songs in particular; I connect with them in a way that seems to speak to my very being. Strange, I know, for a feminist lesbian Chicana from LA to love 90s country, but then this might be precisely why my dad didn’t like labels and the way they could limit the imagination of who one is or can be 😊.  

But now back to my love of Garth…

So, recently when my friend told me that Garth Brooks would be speaking at Vanderbilt University as part of a panel introduced by Emilie Townes, womanist scholar and dean of the Vanderbilt University Divinity School, I knew I’d go. Country music artist Garth Brooks and womanist scholar Emilie Townes in the same time/space…I had to be there! I booked a trip in the middle of my semester and flew out to Nashville, TN to attend the panel; and attending that panel turned out to be a gift because it reminded me of one of the lessons embedded in my dad’s mantra – human, we are all just human.

I have seen Garth Brooks in concert twice now, and I know what an amazing performer he is. He is one of those people that when you see them doing their thing, you know they are doing exactly what they were meant to do and are damn good at it. So, it was a trip to get to see him a bit out of his element – still on stage but as a speaker on a panel that was being moderated by an academic while also fielding questions from additional academics. He was visibly restless, choosing not to sit in his designated chair but on the armrest instead.

Several of his answers to the questions didn’t seem to quite answer the question – it was as if he and the professor asking the question were on two separate planes of realities and not quite meeting each other. In some of his responses, though, he would make explicit reference to the fact that we are all somewhat limited by our given upbringing – how the very fact of our religious and cultural context shapes us in particular ways. At one point even admitting that he used to think all men had one less rib than women, the structural legacy of Eve (one of the first humans in the Bible) having been created out of the rib of Adam. Yes – our cultural and religious upbringings shape us, indeed!

But then there were also times when Garth was at ease—when a given question opened up the opportunity for him to step into his element, walking the stage and standing at its edge closer to the audience, breaking into song. Easy, strong, powerful singing – no instruments needed.

I have experienced Garth in his full splendor (I mean that sincerely) and witnessed his musical and artistic excellence. I connect with his music – it moves me and taps into a deep energy within that makes me feel more alive. At this panel, though, I now also got to see him in his full human complexity. Not as an artist on a pedestal, but as a human with his own quirks and contradictions. Human, just human, living out his own path.

Me, small figure standing on the right side, asking Garth a question.

This post is a set up. 😊 I mean only that it is the first part of a series I’m working on about how we identify and use language for our sense of identity. Labels really don’t capture the reality of human complexity. We use them and they are indeed important – getting to name ourselves is a human right. Mary Daly and other feminists of the Women’s Liberation Movement in the U.S. understood this and made the radical claim that we all have a right to name reality. And, at the same time, with all our complexities and ways of capturing our shared realities in the specific historical contexts within which we exist, knowing ourselves as human, just human, is not as straight-forward as one might think, and I want to continue to reflect on that with you…