Broken Roots? by Sara Wright

I write to
find out
who I am
becoming
and when
I implored
Sedna
to take
me back
to the sea
I came
to know
my roots
to Place
were
broken
by age
by betrayal
by loneliness
by advocating
for a planet
animals, trees
by people
who do not listen
by people who
will not see

like Mother Pine
moaning
outside
my door
I  too
moan
Unforgiving
Ice and Wind
Treachery on every path
Trees encased
in White

At the Bottom
of the Well
Water Murmured
accept
this Break

Underground
Mycorrhizal
threads remain
your Guides

Sedna
rises
meets you
on
dry land
for the second
time in
one year

Come she says
back the Bay
settle in a field
of wheat and gold
with solid
ground
beneath
your feet

Mycelial threads
are
Singing
sparks leaping
from below
we are still
attached
and branching.

We’re waiting!
Your grief
Instructs you

We’ll lead
you

Your grief
Instructs you

We’ll lead you

Your Journey
is not over

Sedna calls
you back from
the edge

 Mycelial roots
support you
Mistress
of the Animals,
and yes,
Grandmother
too.

Notes:

 Sedna is the powerful Inuit Goddess of the Sea, called Mother of the Deep, or the Old Woman who lives in the sea. She is Mistress and Protectoress of all sea animals. Even today the Inuit make offerings to her before they hunt for seals, walrus, whales and other marine animals.

As a young -women I lived on a Maine Island and interacted with seals, porpoises, whales, and fish on a regular basis because my husband was a lobsterman and I fished with him on our boat. I came to know and love all sea mammals as friends who lived in or under the ocean.

Later when I discovered the myth of Sedna, I was deeply drawn to the Inuit version where Sedna marries a dog. Every time I looked at a seal, I saw a dog, which deepened my connection since dogs were so important in my life.

I came to the mountains to advocate for all animals and trees and eventually fungi through the lens of love of my land and through many well researched and published writings.

 Nature has taught me that all beings are interconnected as one living organism. I attempted to educate others about creatures and trees and eventually about the roles of the extraordinary mycorrhizal network below our feet, always with intention of inviting others into a different way of understanding nature as a living organism, who is wise beyond our comprehension. After repeated rejections of one kind or another, I gradually came to the realization of the futility of what I was trying to do.

As a historian friend told me yesterday, we are going backwards.  Another scientist friend calls this behavior willful blindness originating out of fear of change. Others tell me that people are envious or afraid of me because I am ‘different’ and so honest.

 The few of us who are awake can barely tolerate how fast we are catapulting towards self – other destruction. During this last year I gradually came to the painful realization that my work here is done.

A little more than a year ago I had a dream that a big black priest with a huge gold cross was standing to the left of Sedna who had come ashore on the right, her fat front flippers spread wide on solid ground. My beloved Hope almost died on December 24^th of that year from congestive heart failure, and the ordeal of her last 8 months is with me still. I didn’t know then what the dream portended except that Sedna had appeared on dry land. This suggested to me that She was witnessing with deep compassion my love for this dog, and that Hope and I had a limited time to be together before Sedna took her.

As this poem emerged Sedna did too – Sedna is directing my dog-woman self. In this last year I have gradually begun to feel what I already knew. My love for this land is letting me go – Ki knows my work here is done. It’s time to return to the river that leads directly to the sea.