This was a hard post to write. When I write about my personal trauma, it is not only healing for me but adds to the canon of stories of other women that help all of us navigate trauma. That makes it easier. When writing about the trauma of women in a whole culture, I feel a sense of helplessness, especially here in the United States. We are all experiencing a group trauma and it is digging in deep.
January 5, 2024, will live in the Patriarchal Hall of Infamy. On this date the Supremes agreed to allow the rapist, misogynist, trying-to-be-dictator former President an opportunity to have his rights heard. But this same date, the Supremes also told we women that our lives are insignificant. No that’s not right, less than insignificant, a mere distraction to what they consider to be more important issues. They allowed an Idaho abortion law to go into effect that doesn’t allow an abortion even in the case of a medical emergency when a pregnant woman in life-threatening distress has been rushed to the emergency room. The split screen exhibits patriarchy for what it is. I want to use the word, “culmination” but that means the height. I don’t think we’ve reached a culmination because there seems no end to the cruelty that patriarchy seeks to inflict.
This is a system that defines and protects the rights of male power brokers, usually white, while using those gathered rights to deny others any rights.
- People of color (just to start see what’s going on with voting rights),
- Women (as if women’s lifesaving healthcare is not a constitutional right),
- Immigrants (inhuman treatment of people who are vulnerable as a political wedge issue),
- LGBTQ+ (also political wedge) and
- Any other marginalized population that can be labeled “other.”
We saw it when the powers of money, politics, misogyny, racism, white supremacy came together to oust Claudine Gay, the president of Harvard.
It is hard to read the newspaper because the hits of cruelty just keep coming. And they seem to be getting more cruel as time goes on.
Case in point is Brittany Watts in Ohio. She was in the process of miscarrying an unviable fetus when she went to the hospital for care. Even though our medical world can absolutely care for her, she was denied care because of the abortion laws. She was sent home – not once but TWICE! She ended up miscarrying at home in the toilet. She thought she had retrieved the tissue and buried it. She needed to D&C to complete the process so went back to the hospital (if you are keeping track, this is her 3rd trip).
The hospital reported the miscarriage to law enforcement who proceeded to raid her house and take apart her toilet as “evidence.” Subsequently, she was charged with the felony of mishandling human remains. The details are even more harrowing than I outlined. You can read about them here.
It’s hard to be coherent here as my rage seeks to overwhelm me. I will make bullet-points.
- Ms. Watts did her due diligence, sought proper channels to seek care. She ended up with a felony charge anyway. She was offered no options for her own health and well-being.
- Instead of compassion or care, a police raid was triggered when she was at her most vulnerable, having just lost a pregnancy. Hard to imagine that ordeal.
- The health system not only let her down, they betrayed her by gaslighting her into trusting them (“we’ll take care of you”) and then calling in law enforcement.
- A miscarriage is devastating all on its own. In this case, and I am sure many others, the legal and healthcare systems both furthered her trauma. As far I could tell, no one in the system ever offered her even the merest human compassion such as a condolence for her loss.
What is this permission structure that allows for, even encourages, people to engage in actions so void of all compassion and even basic humanity?
When I started to think about the underlying currents, my thoughts turned to Matilda Joslyn Gage (1826-1898). She was an American writer and suffragette as well as an advocate for Native American rights and abolitionism. I first learned about her in a pair of posts that Carol P. Christ wrote in 2019, the pertinent one for this discussion is below:
In this post, Carol discusses how Gage understood the sick, dysfunctional relationship between sexuality and patriarchy. Through Carol’s work, I also learned of a wonderful biography written about Gage titled Born Criminal by Angela Shirley Carpenter.
Carpenter’s title is based on a quote from Gage: “All the crimes which I was not guilty of rushed through my mind. I failed to remember that I was a born criminal—a woman.” Matilda Joslyn Gage
And there you have it. All the rot about abortion restrictions and criminality has nothing to do with being pro-life. It is all about women and our sexuality. How dare we have sex. How dare we enjoy it. Patriarchy demands that women’s sexual activity be punished.
In the case of Ms. Watts, the patriarchal assumption is that she is guilty of “something” because her pregnancy didn’t end in a healthy birth. As Gage told us so long ago, she, like all we women, was “born criminal.” Patriarchy assumes that when a pregnancy is lost, for whatever reason, that is the proof of our criminal guilt. The only thing left is the punishment, even to the point of the death penalty as a pregnant woman’s life is forfeit in states such as Idaho. Now the Supremes have sanctioned it. They have yet to make a permanent ruling, but they have already allowed this law threatening the life of women to go into effect.
We as, women, those who love women, anyone who has a mother, anyone who breaths the air of the earth, in other words all of us . . . we need to find ways to have our voices heard.
Author’s note, an update: Since I wrote this a grand jury declined to indict Ms. Watts. As happy as this makes me, and it does, I still shudder at how she was dragged through the mud with no consideration for her own welfare. I wonder if the groundswell of protest in Ohio had an effect on this decision. I would not expect that popular support would work the same way in other places such as in Texas.
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A topic close to my heart! The “pro-life” mentality in this country has nothing to do with loving “life.” Restrictive abortion laws have everything to do with control of women and their sexuality. THIS: ”And there you have it. All the rot about abortion restrictions and criminality has nothing to do with being pro-life. It is all about women and our sexuality. How dare we have sex. How dare we enjoy it. Patriarchy demands that women’s sexual activity be punished.”
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Thank you, Esther. I know that you’ve written poignantly about your thoughts and experiences. It really does permeate our world. As I see it just as rape is not about sex but about power, so too “pro-life” is not about life but also about power and control.
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I can see why you found this post hard to write. It was very hard to read. The treatment of Ms Watts was so unspeakable, it brought me to tears and the rest of your post brought me to tears of fury. Thank you for writing – these things have to be brought out into the light and not buried, even though we can hardly bear to think about them, because that would suit patriarchy just fine, wouldn’t it?
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Absolutely Senlowes, good point. In fact, I would go so far as to say that keeping us quiet for any reason – trauma, how difficult it is, terrorizing us – is part of the toolkit of patriarchy. It’s been quite effective.
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Thank you Janet. Everyone should be marching or at a rally this weekend. WomensMarch.com – not one by you? HOST ONE. Even if it is just you. Make your voice heard. The remnants of the Eve myth – responsible for all the ills of humanity – must go. Let us now replace her with Lilith.
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Nice comment Caryn although I would take a different angle on the Eve myth. I would like to see us reclaim Eve for all her original power as a Great Goddess and a Tree Goddess of the Levantine cultures. IF we just replace Her with Lilith or anyone other Goddess, the system will try to diminish them as well.
I’ve written about Eve a lot. Here is a 2-parter:
https://feminismandreligion.com/2019/01/25/eve-is-the-hero-of-the-garden-of-eden-part-1-by-janet-rudolph/
https://feminismandreligion.com/2019/01/26/eve-is-the-hero-of-the-garden-of-eden-part-2-by-janet-rudolph/
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Valid point Janet. And will check out your articles. Thank you.
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Janet I commend you for your courage – I can no longer listen to ANY news – I feel suicidal. The cruelty – no – pure evil – that we are dealing with on every front is utterly overwhelming.
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Thank you Sara. I agree completely at how overwhelming it all is.
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Thank you so much for this chilling piece. Thank you for calling attention to Ms. Watts and her brutal ordeal. It is so important to continue to keep these devastating consequences of the resurgence of the radical right front and center, especially as we enter another election cycle. We cannot let it continue.
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Yes, I agree Beth. I hate that we have to rehash trauma and yet it is important that we do. I remember back in the 70s when Roe first passed. The changes happened because there was a spate of white middle class and rich girls were dying in back-alley abortions. Sad as it was, it appeared to me at the time that was the turning point. When these stories started hitting the media.
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You are brave to face your discomfort and write this piece for us. Thank you Janet. I am speechless with disgust. I mustn’t stay speechless however, as this only feeds the patriarchy. Everyone is born of Woman. We must revere Her.
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Thank you Terry. Yes we must revere Her. Well put.
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Thank you for your powerful words
Why is it that men are heroes and receive medals for killing each other, and a woman who suffers a miscarriage is labeled a criminal? Thank goodness the grand jury found otherwise. But this was only after the government dismantled her toilet and the national press informed us in great detail about what was an unbelievably harrowing personal experience that cried out for empathy.
I am frightened of what will happen to the rights we as women have attained if Donald Trump is again president. I have little confidence in men stopping him. I believe this job, if it is going to be successful, will be done by women. And wouldn’t it be grand if that also reduced the power of the patriarch?
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Thank you, Winifred. Well put about the men being heroes in juxtaposition of women suffering miscarriages. I agree that women’s rights are in serious risk if the former guy gets in office again however, I don’t think we are home free without that. Patriarchy permeates our entire culture. And it’s not just here in the US, it is all over the world. Different countries have a different set of rights accorded to women and conversely a lack of rights, but the overall picture is a scary one.
And I totally agree that we women have to step up to make substantive changes.
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I agree: patriarchy is not confined to the US and patriarchy permeates our entire American culture. What frightens me is what took place in Afghanistan after the Taliban regained power. Also, women in Iran once wore miniskirts. Roe was overturned during the last administration. What comes next if Trump returns to office? I speak for myself, he is not my Savior. I am 87 years old and do not want to lose any more of the rights I have gained during my lifetime.
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Oh my goodness, OR oh my goddess. I am there with you Winifred. I not only don’t want to lose any more rights, but I ache that my granddaughters are losing theirs.
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