The Fall of Patriarchy: I Got Scammed by Caryn MacGrandle

I am a few months out of my second marriage. There will be no third. I know my task right now is to become self-sufficient.

Thanks to my second husband, I have valuable Project Management skills. He set up an S-Corporation when he was out of work in Illinois and handed it over to me when he found a salaried job. I gained needed self-confidence over the past eight years and figured out that I am good at Project Management.

Now I need to convince another company of that. Because I am not good at sales and no longer have my main client in my company and with my divorce, I need a steady income.

I thought I had found one.

I was reached out to by a supposedly Swiss company called HAND-Lease that leases and sells extremely large equipment from $25,000 up to $55 million. They had just established a Pennsylvania office and were now opening a Birmingham office. I was phone screened by a customer service employee who said if they were interested, the Human Resource department would reach out to me for a longer interview. 

Instead I got an email saying, ‘Congrats.  We want to hire you.’ The email said it was a pre-employment training period of 30 days that would require two hours a day and be compensated $2000 at the end of the month. At that point, if they were interested, they would extend an offer to me of employment for a Project Management position paying $102,000 a year.

I was leery of this ‘too good to be true’ proposition and asked to speak to someone. A Mr. Ben Watts called me, and we talked briefly. He said he was Swiss and had been with the company seven years. I am fairly certain he was using some sort of translator as there was a lag between what I said and what he answered.

His answers satisfied me enough that I said ‘why not’. I have a lot of time right now as my only focus is to apply for jobs.

So I started their ‘training modules’. They were actually fairly interesting, but just basic project management, supply chain management, international trading etc. information. At the end of the four to five page information, you would take a basic short test. Easy. And I got 100’s on the first four of them. 

They stroked my ego with a ‘we’re so happy with your work and attitude’. We hope it continues. 

I felt good.

And then yesterday I got an email saying that they were having problems finding someone local to purchase office equipment. Could I do it. I would not need to actually go to the new Birmingham location. I would just have to arrange delivery via FedEx and UPS.

Well, that just doesn’t make sense, does it. If you don’t need someone there, why can’t you order it from Pennsylvania?

I started digging more. They are a fake company listing a fake address in Philadelphia.

Luckily, I am out nothing but some pride. And I did actually learn some things from the modules. All is well.

But I did have to spend a few hours yesterday getting over my ‘relief’ at thinking I would have money coming in and mentally going back to the drawing board.

I have another experience this week where a friend of mine left her job because a manager was sending dick pics to an employee and grooming that employee to take advantage of her. 

The employee who received the dick pics feels badly because she thinks she encouraged him. She’s a hard working single mother, and he enticed her with ‘don’t you want someone to take care of you.’

Well, yes, don’t we all. 

But what price are you willing to pay for that?

All around me I am seeing these examples of the old ways crumbling or needing to crumble.

Why would you spend that amount of time and ingenuity on scamming people? Couldn’t your obvious talents be put towards something else?

Why would you take advantage of the power of your position like that?  Don’t you want a partner on equal terms?

We are wading through some powerful currents right now. I go to my weekly Circle, and I see a better world.  One filled with hope, love and support. It is not without its human drama. But that human drama is handled in such an admirable way.

The old ways no longer work. We need new ways.

We need a new world.

BIO: Caryn MacGrandle is the creator behind the Divine Feminine App which has been connecting and inspiring women [and other genders too] throughout the world since 2016 as a directory to find Sacred Circles, events and resources.  Women find the app each and every day, and it currently has almost 8000 users from around the world.  Caryn has also hosted Sacred Circles and events for the past nine years and is passionate about the power of a Circle to heal individuals and the world.  She has participated in numerous online and location events such as the World Parliament of Religions in September of 2021 in which she presented a workshop on Embodying the Goddess:  Creating Rituals with Mind, Body and Soul and just recently a webinar/panel with Dale Allen presenting Dale’s Indie film award winning “In Our Right Minds:  Leading Women to Strength as Leaders and Men to Strength without Armor.”  Each and every day, Caryn (aka Karen Moon) works tirelessly towards her belief that the most important area to first find equality and balance is the divinity found within yourself.

Categories: Abuse of Power, General, Herstory, Patriarchy, Power relations, Women's Voices

Tags: , , , ,

11 replies

  1. We surely do need a new way to relate to one another… Your job experience will I hope help warn other women…I used to be such a trusting person and I have learned the hardest way that in this world almost no one can be trusted. I am hoping the job thing resolves itself in a way that works for you. I remember leaving my 2nd marriage with the same attitude and I still have it – I chose then and choose now to live on my own – that was 30 years ago.. I am not saying it’s been easy – but I do love living alone with my animals but age is really complicating matters because now I need physical help from men who can do things that I cannot – and even now the storyline is the same at 77 – these guys always want – sex – a cook etc in return for “help” Disgusting. For the first time in my life I wish I was rich so I could get away from the whole thing…. Patriarchy reigns with such an ugly twist. I hate feeling this vulnerable.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Yes, I thought at least now when they google ‘HAND Lease’, they will get this article. ;) I am sorry that has been your experience. My prayers to you for a helping, loving community to surround you. We all should have that.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Yes. I thought at least now when someone googles ‘HAND Lease’, they will get this article. :) And I am sorry that has been your experience. My prayers for a warm, loving community around you. Everyone should have that.


  4. Holy cow–what a story! I’m glad you learned some useful things, including that the company in question was fake and fraudulent and that you are now able to take better care of yourself. Yes, indeed, we should all be part of a warm, loving community, a community of people who appreciate our work and don’t try to cheat us. The internet world is filled with cold, hating community–I think it’s called social media, yes??–that just wants to damage us and everything else. Think about cheaters and men who send dick pics. Think about climate change. Are we facing the Last Days? (Sorry to be so pessimistic. Or am I realistic?)

    Bright blessings to us all, blessings to women who go through really stupid experiences and learn from them. Bright blessings to you and all the good work you’re doing for us all.


  5. I’m so sorry that you and your friend had to go through these experiences but glad that you found out in time and now are working on becoming financially self-sufficient. Scammers absolutely take advantage of women’s socialization to be “nice,” to not hurt anyone’s feelings, to be trusting… So many women don’t tell anyone their experiences and don’t ask for help because they are ashamed, but scammers are professionals at it – they know exactly what to say to get you to do what they want. Being scammed can happen to anyone. It’s so important for people to speak out about their experience just as you are doing. Brava to you for raising awareness! And thank you also for still having hope and seeing that we need a new world and working to make it happen.


  6. I, too, had two marriages. The first ended in divorce and the second left me a widow. Never again. I think the best thing women can do is band together with like-minded women. I know several who live in women-only communities or who have female roommates. Co-housing works for some. Especially as we grow older, we need to connect with other women for support and protection.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yes, but I actually think the answer is intentional communities period. My Women’s Circles are now Sacred Circles welcoming all genders. I am not saying there is not room for Women Only spaces. There is. But I also firmly believe the world does not heal until all genders, cultures, creeds learn how to live together. And the men in the Sacred Circle are bringing wonderful balance. Things are changing!!


  7. Would it be possible for a group of single women of all ages to support each other in whatever each one might need? I am talking about a support group where a person lives. The younger women could help with the physical things that older women cannot accomplish. The older wise women could give support to the younger women, because the older women have been around the block a few times. I live in Central America. The women who have been abandoned by their husbands or partners and left with all the children and no education have banded together to form businesses and whatever else each woman might need. The coward men who cannot live up to their role as a descent human being are worthless.


    • Check out villages northwest dot org. It’s an organization in various cities that involves neighbors helping neighbors stay in their homes as they age.


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